Getting Beheaded...Oops Wedded!! :P

I just realized that I am talking about too many serious things theses days, which is so unlike me. Sometimes I feel I’m probably caught in the wrong job. I could rather do an ‘Agony Aunt’ section in some magazine/ newspaper or I could become a Marriage Counselor or something ;) And the worst part is I feel too old for my age doing that!

Well, for those who do not know me, I’m 24, no strings attached. This is my deadline for doing whatever the hell I want to and getting away with it. A few years down the line, I won’t have this luxury. My family is all set to have me handcuffed :)

I am fortunate enough to be born in a family who wouldn’t randomly pick anybody and fasten me with him. They would be more than happy to have me do all the work of finding myself a scapegoat and convincing him to spend the rest of his life with me. In fact the ideal scenario for them would be that I find myself a joker, introduce him to them and then run away with him. We can marry where ever we want (may be in a Gurudwara or some Arya Samaj mandir), come back and the family can hold a small reception ceremony to welcome us. Doing this solves two purposes: one, the responsibility of marrying the daughter is taken care of and they don’t even spend too much money on a traditional ‘big-fat-punjabi-wedding’! ;)

But I guess I just wasn’t born to have such a utopian life. A loser that I am, I couldn’t patao a single guy in all these 24 years. I’ve spent 3 goddamn years studying in the North Campus of Delhi University: supposedly the most happening place in town. The department I work in has the youngest crowd in the entire company. No wonder people find it hard to believe that I am NOT dating anyone. And I don’t blame them for it. Most of the times I end up wondering the same! :P

But then I’ve got someone to put the blame on: I allege my friends who’ve been with me in college for it. Those assholes never left me alone and never made me feel the need to have boyfriend. I was all so content being with them- hanging around, partying, experimenting things! And office, I strongly believe, is not a place to make friends, forget boyfriends!

So here I am, at the mercy of my family members, enduring their scornful looks, for finding me a life partner. I remember, ever since I’ve given an affirmative nod to start finding a match for me, I have become a source or entertainment and time pass for too many people around me (all my immediate family members to start with). Getting me married has become an AGENDA of their life. They breathe, eat, and sleep dreaming of marrying me off. At any given point in time, they have a handful of prospect ‘grooms’ ready for me. Not only this, they have even visualized my life plans with each one of them. While meeting the guy, the nervousness on their faces is commendable… as if they are the ones who are going to be judged by the boy, not me!

These people have all plans set:- the wedding theme, the venue, the functions, the guest list, the wedding gifts, the shopping, the jewellery, the Chandni Chowk bridal lehenga, the designer outfits each one is planning to flaunt, the caterer who would do the food, the traditions to be followed…the only thing missing from the picture is the ‘Dulha’!!

So the required steps have been taken: my profile has been uploaded on the leading matrimonial sites, I have been made some nice, decent crepe suits to be worn when being displayed in front of the morons that they short list for me, and I am being trained to act all feminine and lady like {blush} The tom boyish attire and behavior wouldn’t work any more. Matrimony has to prioritize over my friends and my career.

As for me, it looks like a short life. Any day, I would be married to someone who I haven’t even met till now, who may be a complete contrast to what I am, who’s idea of fun may not coincide with mine. So I’m making the most of what is left for me... By not thinking. By not planning. By not caring :)

Cheers!!!